Yeah, I smoked it.
First time ever.
Coughed and sputtered, graceful and ladylike.
I didn’t like it.
It didn’t like me.
But the smell reminded me of someone, you see.
You wouldn’t recognize me lately.
It seems I reinvent myself following each disappointment.
That is, before settling back to who I am.
I just need a little while for distractions,
where I can purge these emotions recklessly,
until my mind is no longer my enemy,
and my words have stopped fighting with me.
Yeah, I keep busy.
Until I can start sleeping again,
and facing my bathroom mirror.
I’m okay with it.
I’m okay with me.
That is, once I’m myself again, you see.
Who are YOU? said the Caterpillar.
This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. Alice replied rather shyly, I hardly know, sir, just at present – at least I know who I WAS when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then.